Its Tourist Hunting Season

As if you hadn't noticed all the stupid people running around the Metro system. You should come down to the Mall. I was in at least six family photos yesterday. That I know of. (On a side note, do you ever wonder what people think when they get home and they see a random dude in their photos?)

Spring break is just starting, and the chaperoned groups of middle/high schoolers are already getting to me. I don't know if I could survive another summer. The crowds of hormonal morons are swarming to see the Cherry Blossoms. Too bad for them its cold, rainy, and blossom free outside. There's some nice witchhazel blooming outside my building, but its not quite the same.

The highlight of tourist hunting season is watching the locals interact with people who come from places where "common sense" and "courtesy" mean don't urinate on other people. The commute yesterday witnessed an amazing episode between a woman standing to the left(with small child and rolling bag) and a line of commuters on the escalator at Metro Center.

Commuter 1: Pardon me, move to the right.
Stupid Tourist: Excuse me?
C1: Move over so that your fat ass doesn't block the way.
ST: I was here first!
C1: GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WAY!
ST: Fuck you!
C2: Move over you fucking moron!
C3: That's my goddamn train!
ST: (as she moves over) Fucking fuck fuckers! Fuck fuck!
C1: (as he passes ST) Stupid bitch.
C2: (as she passes ST) Get some common courtesy.
C3: (as he passes ST and sees his train pulling away) You are fucking useless!

Then as the entire line of people pass her by, she continues screaming profanities at the top of her lungs. I feel bad for the kid. Usually you don't have to hear your parents publicly belittled like that until you're a little older.

Any great stories that you want to share?