Burning Questions, Morning Edition
1. When do you become too old to drink from plastic cups on a regular basis? I'm not talking about Solo cups here, just regular-sized, plastic souvenir cups. I guess what I'm really asking is whether this is a generational phenomenon in which our parents never drank out of plastic cups because when they were young plastic hadn't been invented yet; a stage in life in which I will grow out of as I age; or is this a class issue that was never touched upon in my urban middle-class world?
On a related note, do you buy matching sets of silverware before or after you buy matching glassware?
2. Why is bird crap white? Britt, I'm really looking to you on this one, but I didn't want to clutter your email.
3. One of the young neighbors works for a certain evil place I like to call the Heritage Foundation. I know, repulsive. The other day I saw her and she was wearing what could only be called a sailor's outfit, navy blue top and skirt with garish white piping. Could conservative think-tanks require their employees to wear such ridiculous outfits or is this just a case of a Midwestern girl gone horribly astray?
On a related note, do you buy matching sets of silverware before or after you buy matching glassware?
2. Why is bird crap white? Britt, I'm really looking to you on this one, but I didn't want to clutter your email.
3. One of the young neighbors works for a certain evil place I like to call the Heritage Foundation. I know, repulsive. The other day I saw her and she was wearing what could only be called a sailor's outfit, navy blue top and skirt with garish white piping. Could conservative think-tanks require their employees to wear such ridiculous outfits or is this just a case of a Midwestern girl gone horribly astray?
posted by Fletch at
7:54 AM
8 Comments:
Well Fletch, until we are wealthy, we will probably continue to drink out of plastic cups. However, you should remember, we are also the Nalgene generation...
As for the matching glassware, my sister already bought me 4! And didn't my mom get you monogrammed cups (glass not plastic) for your graduation? matching glassware 2, silverware 0.
As for my neighbor, I can't really help you. I've been around the shopping block, but even I haven't found the garish frock of which you speak. Maybe when they start work, they get a list of red state shops...
By
Lauren, at 9:22 AM
Can I take a stab at this Fletch--*holding out olive branch*--
1. Never. My brother still has 1984 World Series cups. I venture to guess they might be called "vintage" by some--and worth money to others. And, dude, just go to Target and get a good starter kit combo. It'll get you through until you marry Lauren...errr...did I just open a can of worms?
2. Damn. Stumped. Better question is why does bird crap eat through car paint?
3. Supposedly these funky stripes (to which one can assign a sailor's outfit) are in this season. I call bullshit. Rarely can one pull this off--and it should never be a guy--unless, well, he is in the Navy. For the record, Heritage Foundation folks aren't right in the head.
By
The Senator, at 9:28 AM
Senator, that can was opened a couple of weeks ago. Check the archives with a link to her.
bird crap: to answer this question we must first look at excretion in general which is normally divided into urine (from the circulatory system via the kidneys) and feces (digestive refuse). In humans, these come out different holes. Additionally, we excrete our nitrogenous circulatory waste in the form of liquid urea diluted wtih water. Birds send both wastes together out a single hole, the cloaca, which also triples as the vagina. They excrete their circulatory nitrogen as chrystalline uric acid which appears white. When there are dark spots in the mix, that is feces.
your wecome,
britt nye
By
8yearoldsdude, at 12:03 PM
If you're in your twenties, you don't buy glassware... you steal pint glasses from novelty bars like Cap City Brewery, Gordon Birsch, or Rock Bottom.
By
Anonymous, at 12:34 PM
i can get you kids matching dinnerware and glassware, if that's really what you're after. i can even get you pint glasses that can pretend to have stolen from pubs. i'm thinking you should hold onto the plastic cups though. ebay, my friend, ebay.
By
Anonymous, at 1:56 PM
Don - I bet you could get us sample t-shirts that we could pretend we got at thrift stores too huh?
By
Lauren, at 2:41 PM
Dude, stolen pint glasses? come on. The material culture of your apartment projects, "I'm a thief, a drunk, and I think I'm cool."
Just go to marshall's.
-hungover
By
8yearoldsdude, at 8:17 AM
I have one busy day at work and...
Britt, thank you for the background on bird genitals. Does the cloaca also serve as a male vagina? Would this mean that male on male bird action would or would not be gay?
As for the glasses and flatware question, I will continue to ponder. I may come to a deeper understanding of my own masculinity when I purchase my own set of matching glasses. Although faux-stolen pub glasses are an intriguing idea...
By
Fletch, at 9:09 AM
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